Vesper

If only you would come clean,
and not stand divided between
the East wall and the West,
the cold trenches in your sides are bleeding,
reddening from brick dust,
in rivulets they trickle down your spine.
Say never, or today, before this fire dies.
When trust is broken, all you’re left with is biding time.

These words say it all

Loss Adjuster

Scale down your expectations once again
from rest of life to years to one whole night
to will he wander past a phone or pen.
If he would only either ring or write.
Get real and scale these expectations down
from conversation to a single word –
see through the window of a shop in town
if not by you then by a trusted third
party, or, if a sighting is too much
to hope for (as undoubtedly it is)
scale down your hopes and aim to see or touch
someone whose name sounds similar to his.
A scale of one to ten. Two weeks ago
he dared to keep you waiting while he slept.
Scale down much further and today’s poor show
tomorrow you’ll be happy to accept.

The Cycle

I cannot stay — I’m not the one deserting –
Or go; you are no longer here to leave.
I can’t forgive, not without also hurting,
Forget, or I’ll be even more naive.
I can’t confer; I’d feel that I was cheating.
I can’t concede a case I’ve never fought
Or win and not administer a beating.
I cannot settle in or out of court,
Can’t give in case I implicate the taker,
Can’t take from everyone with ground to give
And gather acre on untended acre
When I need just a few square feet to live,
Can’t end this in a neat or messy way.
I cannot start again. I cannot stay.

– Sophie Hannah